1st XI v YMCA (H)
Saturday, 2nd May 2015
West of England Premier League
Bristol & North Somerset
I have a friend who is an Australian ... who owns a cricket equipment shop ... but, pumpkins, he won't sell me stuff. He says "Shaun, you’re such a bad cricketer that if people saw that Globe supplied you, I'd lose customers". Fair point some of you may say. But this is why we met on a boat with a bar in Hotwells and over a few Apple based drinks I soon had under the table a new pair of bright salmon pink cricket boots and a new pair of whites (tubby kid size).
All this means that it was the start of another cricket season and after last year’s relegation there was no need to feel down, we just needed to pick ourselves up off the ground there was no need to be unhappy... So the Village People welcomed YMCA to Chew Court for the opening fixture.
As it was the first game of the season the weather was grey and it wasn't raining but drizzle. Charlie told us but it was going to stop at 2.34 ... and it did. But by then the Red Indian chief had won the toss and Chew were 2 down for 50 odd with both the skipper and Watto back in the hutch.
But a Young Man had different ideas. I said “Young Man are listening to me? and do what you wanna be”. And he did. The posh kid who can play when he's not off shooting poor people in Scotland or out fly fishing with JR Hartley, not only scoring his first hundred for the Village People but doing it in front of his father who hasn't watched him since he scored 189 for Durham university keeping a certain A Strauss out of the side; and look what happened to him… But Dave never mentions it.
So we get to 196 all out which we thought was slightly below par but the Leather Clad Biker and the Builder bowled good lines. Tea was taken – or in the Chairman’s case piled on a platter – but we all felt we could have a good meal. The half-a-pint-of-shandy-dash tea lady did Chew proud with chicken wings, cheeky corn beef and tomato rolls and even a flan/quiche combo.
So we bowl a bit badly and it Goes West, but credit to the American Policeman and The Cowboy as they bat well but then Chew’s own white Joel Garner gets one of them to snick off and the door is open.
The King and Charlie officially put the squeeze on, and with YMCA down to 10 men as the Builder had a work place injury (lawyers 4 you don't bother) we got home with YMCA all out for under 160.
So first game and we remember what cider tastes like after a win, we finally put a bit of pride on the shelf, and we prove that no man can do it all by himself. Although with Dave getting 115 and the rest of 79 that's not strictly true…
Nets Thursday please. Just to hear the Andrew Strauss story AGAIN........
Report by Chew Elvis