1st XI v Shirehampton (H)
Saturday, 27th June 2015
West of England Premier League
Bristol & North Somerset
War of Attrition turns bottom of the table Gold Cup into nervy drama @Chew Court
The sun was shining the weather was sweet but the batsmen, alas, did not want to move their feet. As Geoffrey Boycott might have said in his pitch report at the toss “it is a cool ground and today is a day to bat all day”; what a myth that turned out to be as it descended into a right royal frolic with a nervous finish seeing the mighty Magna triumph by just 3 wickets in a low scoring encounter with near neighhhhh-bours Shirehampton.
Char Charles Charlie Charles #thomspsonout (CCCC#To) staggered home through the cool dawn just as Vile was off for his dawn run in preparation for a mudrun on Sunday, the rest of the CMCC team were safely tucked up in their beds dreaming of the visit of the Shirehamptonians.
The warm ups were synchronised but it was more than bob’s worth to do too much in the heat of the midday sun so Dash flipped a midsummer norton’s coin and it looks like trouble as the away skipper calls correctly and instantly decides to bat.
FilerG is back in the starting XI and coming off his long run so with barely ten up the Shirehamptonians are three down and Chew want to see more of this business. After his performance of the previous week the diminutive Aussie takes the new ball slot from his best mate and instantly delivers the goods. The fellow Connell also charters in to join the party with 4 wickets of his own. Chew are knocking hard for victory but Nichols digs in with 40 in 40 overs and it is left to young master ‘Oats’ Thomas on debut to finish the job and clean up the tail with a traditional full and straight delivery. The Shirehamptonians have only mustered 134 and a little owl tells me that is someway under par and even the local cottage rake thinks Chew can win.
Having heard about the feasts on offer in the valley at tea time is was rumoured that the Prince Regent was due to drop by and sample the delights but with Cher boycotting the game as Chew Elvis had been dropped (or unavailable in Barcelona depending on your point of view #Chewgolfdayfriday3july2015) kicking King Mondair steps in to produce the goods and some supreme cordial is enjoyed.
At the restart the thinker’s money is on Chew but the Shirehamptonians huddle and strike with the very first ball of the innings sending the silver flamed Dash back to the hutch wishing Mr Mulligan had used his influence in cricket rather than golf. After a brief convenience break Lee emerges onto the oval and hits his first two balls for four like a latter day Roddy Owen or Lord Windermere in his prime. Shire are not finished however and Lee is back for another attack on the pavilion conveniences at the end of the second over with Chew teetering 13 for 2. Davy Lad and Chew’s own answer to the imperious Arkle, Stu Watson, steady the ship with some selected hitting and Chew coast to 91 for 2 in the 13th over when Vile is bowled. Suddenly runs are rarer than a desert orchid and the wickets continue to tumble. First Blower D flaps like a mandarin dealing with Brexit, Connell smashes to long off and CCCC#To is flummoxed as though a Frenchman has opened a new bistro in the valley and offered him ‘L’escargot monsieur?’ CCCC#To would rather eat the fox who is after his chickens.
Luckily Blower A and FilerG are on hand with some lusty blows and it is soon red rover (sic). Imperial Commander Dash surveys another victory and apple-based drink Celebrations begin and by Midnight the court was surely the place to be.
Next week we start over with a trip to YMCA…the most hotly anticipated battle since local somerset legends Kuato Star and Denman took up their reins on Cheltenham’s hill in 2011.
Report by DL